Dreams of a Shinobi
by Kitsune Alchemist
Summary: Haku loved Zabuza. Too bad, really, that he can't admit it until he's almost dead. ZabuzaXHaku -Oneshot-


Disclaimer: I own nothing even remotely related to Naruto, though I have officially banned my friends from using Haku on "Naruto: Ultimate Ninja 2"…

A/N: This is a rewrite of my first official Yaoi story, which I reread and decided needed a major rewrite. If you enjoyed the original version, I do apologize, but at least give this version a chance before deciding to completely dismiss it. Thank you. Also, this entire story is in Haku's POV, just so you know

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I sat uncomfortably in Gato's office next to Zabuza-san, glowering hatefully behind his mask. Who was this man that sat there giving my Master orders as if the fact that he had hired the Demon of the Mist gave him the right to control every aspect of the murderous man? Who was he to believe he deserved the right for his neck not to be slit open at the slightest provocation? He was nobody, and the fact that his guards hadn't even though enough to check what I held my hair back with was proof of that. After all, the fact that there were two shiny needles preventing my hair from falling also meant that I had two weapons within easy reach with which I could kill this rich man who believed himself invincible.

There wasn't even a hint of emotion on my Master's face, but the subtle twitch of his fingers toward the sword that he had left near the door led me to believe in his impatience. Gato continued to spew words in his disgusting voice, and finally, Zabuza stood. "You want me to attack again tomorrow, so soon after my last attempt? Even in this limited amount of time, I have weakened, and they have gotten a chance to become stronger," Zabuza-san growled, glancing once at me. I bowed my head, knowing that he had already developed new ways to attack and defeat the protection that the bridge builder had hired.

"Are you saying that you cannot do it?" Gato growled, making a motion that he must have thought was casual but was highly noticeable and suspicious to both myself as well as Zabuza-san, if I were to judge by his narrowing eyes. There was a minute echo of approaching footsteps from the direction of Gato's worthless bodyguard and a second later there was a clang of metal as their kunai met my senbon needles in midair, sending metal in all directions. There was a cry as one of my needles stabbed it into their leg, going most of the way through the limb. I frowned, upset that I had missed, but scooped up my other needle from where it had landed in the wall a mere inch from my hand.

"I never said that" Zabuza-san snarled, not bothering to look at the bodyguard who had attempted to kill him, despite the fact that the man was now whimpering on the ground with his bleeding leg clutched between white his finger. I poised over him with my weapon in my hand, glancing questioning at Zabuza-san every few seconds. He shook his head and I lowered my arm, not really caring that my hair was now falling loosely down my back and making me look more feminine.

"Then why did you say anything at all? Go, and I expect you to kill him," Gato said and I felt a hiss forming near the back of my throat as I debated whether I could horribly maim the man with my one remaining senbon needle. Zabuza turned and exited, not glancing at me as he grabbed his sword and continued down the hallway. I followed, not bothering to reclaim my lost weapon for fear of any blood-transmitted diseases.

"Zabuza-san?" I ventured to ask and he glanced at me over his shoulder, bandages twitching a bit as his expression shifted in an unreadable alteration. "Why do you continue to allow him to tell you what to do?"

There was no reply as he continued to walk, head turning to face straight ahead once again. It wasn't until we got outside of Gato's hideout that there was even a sound from his direction that was not the shift of fabric or the nearly silent sound of his footsteps. "Go back to where we stay, Haku. We'll need your Bloodline Limit to be able to defeat these ninja," Zabuza commanded and I flinched, but dared not remind him that he had still just barely healed from the "death" that I had put him under. He glanced at me and I was glad for the mask that hid my face, for he knew not…

He never knew of the feelings that I hid. I hated it, to see my Master, my Zabuza-san, my precious person, stare at me and see me as nothing but a tool. For while I was proud to be his tool, while I enjoyed being used by my precious person, I felt a shallow emptiness at the thought that I was nothing more than that.

"Yes, Zabuza-san," I said, bowing low before him before turning and disappearing back into the night, knowing that I would be too worried about Zabuza-san, my precious person, to sleep tonight. As I fled, I got a sick feeling that I should have told him that I felt more than just the feelings of a tool. I should have told him how I felt…

_Zabuza-san, why did it have to end up this way? Why is it I who lay here attempting to continue to live? If I close my eyes, they might never open again, but they feel too heavy to keep open. Maybe I should just let myself go, for maybe my dream has not come true, but didn't I know that it was not likely the very second I let myself become like this? It does not matter anyways. It is for you. It is all for you. I became like this for you._

_If I die, I will have died for you, and this makes every one of my dreams feel much less important. But… what is my dream? I have no dream, but for what I told Naruto and the boy that protected him. My dream is to help fulfill your dream, Zabuza-san. Whatever that dream is, I must help you accomplish it. I cannot die until I have helped you fulfill every one of your dreams._

_But I cannot stay awake for much longer. Let me close my eyes and dream. Let me imagine that we may continue and fulfill our dreams together. Of course, this is a delusion on my part, for I know when I open my eyes, I will not be here. I asked you once if you believed in an afterlife, and you told me plainly, Zabuza-san, that you would go to Hell when you died and I would not. Can I believe that? Shouldn't I go to Hell for my crimes?_

_For I have killed, and I have maimed, and I have not cried once for those whose bodies I leave strewn on the battlefield. So shouldn't I go to Hell? I want to, Zabuza-san. I want to go to Hell, for if I do not, I will never see you again, and that would be worse than any Hell. Maybe that is my punishment for my crimes? Or maybe we will just fade from existence, and you were wrong, and there is no afterlife. Either way, I will never be able to survive after death._

_Just so you know, I want to hear your voice one more time. Can you hear me? I'll admit it. I want to hear you so badly that it hurts. Or is that death? Does this death hurt? I'm pretty sure I was numb until a few seconds ago…_

_Why is it this cold? Is this snow? I have not felt snow for so long… You erased the snow for me, Zabuza-san._

_I suppose its alright if I die now… I suppose its fine… will you meet me again Zabuza-san? Will you erase my snow?_

_I love you Zabuza-san…_

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Okay, so that was my rewrite? Hope you like it if you did the first time, and hope if you never read the original that you appreciate this one.

For any of you who are wondering, I felt that since Haku was dieing he'd have trouble keeping one train of though for very long… The only thing he really focused on was Zabuza… oh well… Read and Review please!


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